How do I Feel About Yasser!

Post your jokes, humor articles, Satire, funny short stories, comedy plays, satirical poems, parody, comedy video & audio clips & other humor pieces here.

Moderator: Club Operations

How do I Feel About Yasser!

Postby Ahreeman X » Tue Feb 22, 2005 2:18 pm

How do I Feel About Yasser!

Oldies but Goodies
Old IPC Files

Lets see, what kind of input can I give here?! Hmmmmmmmm!

Mr. Arafat & PLO are one of the main reasons among many other
reasons, that Islamic Republic of Iran is Alive now! Basically Muslim
Reactionaries of 1979 were trained in Terrorist camps of PLO.

Having this in mind, plus many other international episodes of him,
also the way he danced in Imam Khomeini's victory celebration Banquet
in Tehran on 1979, I must bravely state that:

If you believe that Sharon has a personal agenda & problem with
Arafat, then you have no idea about my special personal issues that I
have with Mr. Arafat!

During the years, there were times that I quietly laid down in bed,
staring @ the ceiling, late @ night & used my wild imagination to
develop new methods of removing Mr. Arafat's internal body organs
piece by piece without using any anesthetics! I created a few
interesting styles of torture specially for Yasser! For a while I
actually started to plan his kidnapping & to drag him over "Dr.'s
House of pleasure & pain" for me to experiment on him & to actually
measure the amount of pain that an Arab Terrorist can take without
breaking apart! Yet Alas, many Alas, that he already got plane
crashed & his whole body is shaking in Parkinson disease! So I had
pity for him & just got satisfied with his picture on my dart board,
knife throwing board, & Chinese star throwing board!

However, there were these couple of young devoted Muslim boys of San
Diego Local Hezbollah that were giving the student protesters a hard
time & they were bullying around San Diego Campus same as Basijis in
Tehran; therefore, they had to carry the torch for Yasser! All my
frustrations toward Arafat got piled up & I just had to do something
about it. Finally one day, I gave up to my twisted desires & sent my
boys to drag these couple of devoted ones to the back street & the
dark corner near the back alley! Once they started tough, it was a
turn on, yet when they ended up begging like a wounded puppy, it was
more of a turn on!

For some reason, every time I used my knowledge of Martial Arts to
push only with one finger on their sensitive pressure points of the
body (Kung Fu), until I heard them scream, I was visualizing Arafat's
head & face & it became more of a turn on!

Its like you press a little finger on one of the major 18 pressure
points of their body & once they twitch, you press just a little more
until you hear a scream! And then again, once you hear the scream,
you just press a little more finger & then they scream murder! Thats
when their scream becomes the sweetest opera by Wagner or Puccini &
it soothes my soul! Ah yes, I can just close my eyes & remember, felt
so good, much better than sex........

Have you ever heard the sound of a Hezbollahi bone or joint that
cracks? It doesn't just go "Crack"! It goes something like:

"Crack, snapple, pop.....Allah O Akbar.....Crack, snapple,
pop......." so cool indeed!

Oh lord, all this reminiscing about violence, Arafat & local Muslim
boys, is beginning to turn me on, I am getting frustrated again &
developing an urge.......... I talk to you later, I got to give
couple of boys a call & maybe do an early morning raid on the local
house of "Muslim Students Association" near the campus, maybe we even
drop by the IRI local compound....Oops, I mean IRI's local Mosque, &
steal ourselves a young rooster or two to play Cracky Pop with!

But it can never be like having a private session with Arafat. Just
me, Yasser in chains & shackels, pair of twisers, a needle, a dark
room & padded walls, so no one can hear his screams! Oh Yes........

May I also say that, Sharon is one of the last Jew Politicians with
Balls, yet I am beginning to get very disappointed with him! I do not
see any progress @ all! What is going on? What is wrong with that Jew
Boy? I think I got to call Sharon & teach him a few styles of torture
to do on Hamas, Hezbollah & Al Jihad........and until I do not see
Yasser's Right testicle on the platter in Tel Aviv, I will remain
very disappointed of Ariel's performance! I want to see some action,
some guts & blood, Yes Sir, Yas Sir, Yasser, Yasser Arafat that is!

I mean what the hell?! The other day I got my popcorn & Soda, sat on
the couch with a FOX & turned the TV on FOX, & there was this FOX
named Laurie Dhue on FOX, & she showed some news clips from Israel,
but no show! No blood, guts, intestines coming out, brains smashing
or blood gushing out, would you believe nothing, nada, zilch?! That
bastard Sharon seized fire for a bit & no arrests or elimination of
any Hamas or PLO leader! What the hell?! I sat down for a good show,
& there it was, a no show! I wanna see a good war, nothing is more
appetizing than a good action pact war, you know, the kind with body
parts blowing in all directions & so?! Cmon Ariel, give me a break,
Showtime please? I even got myself a dozen box of Custco Popcorn & a
case of Ginger Ale! Wheres the beef? Wheres the show Ariel? Jesus
Christ Super Star, whats a man to do for fun?!

What can I say, I just love America & I specifically love the SEX &
Violence in America! Only in America baby, only in America!

got to go........things to do..............skulls to
crack..........this & know!

Wheres The Beef?!

Dr. Evil
Watcher in the woods
User avatar
Ahreeman X
General 5 Star
General 5 Star
Posts: 1446
Joined: Fri Nov 12, 2004 1:54 pm
Location: San Diego, CA, USA

Return to Jokes, Comedy, Parody, Satire & Satirical Poetry Room

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 0 guests